Queenietastic!
by midnightluck
Summary: The continuing adventures of Queenie, much against her will. Roy is reluctant, Wally is conflicted, some loose ends are brought together, and Robin TROLLS MOAR, N00BS.


__All recognizable characters belong to their respective owners (Cartoon Network).__

__Please be warned: references to boys kissing, and to sex and prostitution, and also many bad words. Read at your own discretion.__

__Takes place between __The (Not-So-)Triumphant Return of Queenie__ and __Meeting Queenie.__ Can be read independently, as well.____ Part of the Boys In Heels Series.  
><em>_

* * *

><p>"Roy! Your girlfriend's at the door!" Oliver Queen hollered up the stairs.<p>

"I don't have a girlfriend!" Roy hollered right back down, but he still came to the top of the stairs to see who it was.

"Oh, don't be silly," Chastity purred. "And hurry up, we're gonna be late!"

Roy made a completely manly noise of distress, and tactically retreated to his room, locking the door and beginning a barricade.

"Don't mind him!" Ollie said cheerfully. "I keep teaching him manners, but he always somehow manages to lose them. It's nice to see you again, uh...?"

"Chastity," she supplied. "Yes, he can be a handful, but he's so worth it."

"My feeling exactly!" he beamed, bowing over her hand and sparkling at her. "And may I say, you look lovely today."

She sparkled back, and giggled. "You're such a charmer, Mr. Queen! But sadly, I'm taken."

He was overdramatically surprised, and said, "Yes, by some lout hiding upstairs. Wait here, sweetheart, I'll go fetch him."

"Thanks," she responded, cocking a hip against the door and waiting.

The sounds of scuffling and yelling, and something heavy hitting something immovable were heard, topped with Oliver's cheery voice and Roy's screeching.

"—very nice girl!"

"Is _not_ a nice girl, she's not even—"

"Even better, bad girls are more fun, I'm so proud of you—"

"—seriously, _heels_! For the love of all things holy don't make me—"

"—here's your cell phone, here's some money, show her a good time, mmkay?"

"Oh my god, please, just don't—"

Oliver set the squirming boy down by the door. "There you go, _mademoiselle_. One boyfriend, slightly disheveled, but still in good condition!"

"Thanks ever so, Mr. Queen!" she said, grabbing his hand. "I'll have him home by ten, I promise."

"Oh, that's fine, don't worry about it. Just make sure he treats you right, doll."

"Will do! Thanks again!"

And Oliver watched Chastity drag Roy down the driveway, beaming at how his little boy was growing up so fast.

* * *

><p>"So, you want the red dress or the black one for today? I brought both, and a few others."<p>

"I'm not talking to you."

"Got the shoes, too, but you need to decide, because it'll make a difference in the make-up."

"Can you even legally fly this?"

"You're right, the black is more for the evening. We want something more casual."

"How did you get him to lend you the Batplane for today, anyhow?"

"Maybe just jeans and a dressy top, that'll work."

"Why do I put up with you, again?"

"Because you love me. And Wally. Because you love us."

"If by 'love', you mean 'despise with every fiber of my being', then yeah."

"See? Who says romance is dead?"

"Why do I even bother."

Robin gently landed the plane and opened the cockpit. He hopped out, stuck the landing, even in heels, and started riffling through the back compartment. "Here, put this on," he said tossing something dreadfully round and squishy and familiar at Roy, who growled and grumbled.

"Look," Robin said, "it's Wally's birthday, and he's had a bad month or two. You know we've got to have something for him, and unless you've got a better present stashed in your armpit or something, this'll have to do. So man put and put on the boobs."

"I hate you," Roy said, but he did start changing. "This is a stupid idea and I hate you forever and I'm only doing this for Wally, understand?"

"Sure," Robin said. "And you're never doing it again, ever, at least until next time."

"Exactly," Roy sulked, tugging on the skirt. "No, wait—"

"Here's your make up kit."

"I don't have a—"

"Foundation first, here, let me show you, then—"

"Yes, thank you," Roy snatched the container. "I can do my own make up!"

Robin surrendered the case easily enough, and went back to digging through the bags. "Here, red top, white skirt, red heels. I like these ones, too. The straps are very sexy."

Roy sputtered, waving a tube of mascara through the air. "Those things are, like, five inches tall!"

"Two, actually," Robin replied with manic cheerfulness. "No, use a darker red lipstick, and, hey wait, you're shaping the eyes all wrong!"

"Am not! This is a perfectly acceptable make up technique—"

"Like hell! Grow up and just admit you can't do your own eyes!"

"No, stop, gimme that! Oh, no, you're not bringing that torture device near my eyes, I need them, holy shit, Robin, _stop_!"

"There," said Robin, leaning back and leaving Roy a gibbering mess. "We'll do lessons later, but for now, put this on." Contradictory to his orders, he stuck the wig on Roy's head himself, pulling and pinning and twisting and primping. "There you go."

It took Roy a few seconds, but he pulled himself together enough to say, "_I am not your doll!_"

"Don't be silly; you're much prettier than a silly doll. Now come on, school gets out in fifteen minutes! Let's go!"

And once again, Roy found himself bowled over by Hurricane Robin, dressed to the nines in heels that pinched, and still confused on how it all happened.

It was all Ollie's fault for betraying him.

* * *

><p>Wally sighed, and hiked his bag up higher on his shoulder. It sucked, having to go to on his birthday, and it doubly sucked because it was Friday, and he should totally be allowed to skip school for a Friday-Birthday.<p>

On the upside, though, Robin had promised a surprise sometime this weekend, so that was something to look forward to. He had been thinking about what it could be all day, kind of, in between staring out the window and pretending to pay attention. Robin's surprises were generally...well, surprising.

Wally waved good bye to a few people he knew, heading towards the gate. It wouldn't take long to get home, and no one would see him while he was running, but he had to find a hidden place to start from. There was a nice crevice just down the block that usually worked pretty well, so if he could just get past this strange crowd at the gate, he'd be fine.

Spotting James, he joined the back of the crowd. "What's going on?" he asked his friend.

"Look!" James hissed, pointing. "These totally hot girls are just hanging around. I think they're waiting for somebody."

"Those _legs_," Adam sighed next to him.

"Those _curves_," another boy added. "The blond one is just—"

"Sure," James said, "I call dibs on the redhead."

"They've gotta be college girls," Adam said. "Have you heard the stories about the college girls?"

Wally jumped, cheating just a little in order to get a glimpse of these babes, and then almost fumbled his landing.

"Oh my god," he said quietly, staring at the back of some kid's head. "Oh my _god_."

"I know, right? Aren't they amazing?"

"Holy shit." Because anyway he looked at it, his _best friend _was at his school, wearing a dress. Wally didn't know why Robin felt the need to humiliate him like this, but he would find out.

"I wish I could go talk to them..."

"Who do you think they're waiting for? I'm so jealous."

Oh. "_Oh_," he said, and the full implications sank in. The world saw Chastity, not Robin-in-a-dress, he reminded himself, and started to smile.

Best birthday present _ever_.

He shuffled around through the crowd, heading towards the side of the gate where there were fewer people. "Excuse me," he muttered, "Sorry, pardon me, coming through..."

And then 'Chastity' caught sight of him. "There he is!" she said, grabbing the other girl's arm. She stood on tiptoe, bouncing and waving. "Hi, Wally!"

And the student body's collective jaw dropped as the two dream-girls glommed onto the geeky science nerd.

"Hi, ladies," Wally said, sliding an arm around Chastity's waist. "How are we today?"

"Homicidal," Roy grunted, and Wally laughed.

"But you look great! You make a very sexy girl, Roy."

"Oh, you haven't met," Chastity said, snuggling into Wally's side. "Wally, this is Queenie."

Wally threw back his head and laughed. "Best name ever," he said, and offered the taller girl his arm.

"Enjoy it," Roy growled, taking Wally's arm with vengeful grace. "This is the last time this is ever happening, ever."

"Up until next time," Chastity said, and Roy repeated, "Right, up until—Wait..."

Chastity laughed, and said, "Happy birthday, Wally."

It took him a second to sublimate the urge to strangle his friend, but Roy also said, "Yeah, happy birthday."

"You guys are the best," Wally said fondly. "Thanks."

"We know," Robin said breezily, and tugged on Wally, who accidentally tugged Roy along too. "Now come on, birthday boy," she said, loud enough to be heard across the street. "Let's go have some fun!"

Wally turned to wave at James and Adam, and knew he'd have some explaining to do come Monday. But right now, he had two gorgeous girls on his arms, and a birthday to celebrate.

"Ice cream and dancing sound good to you?" Robin asked.

"_Dancing?_" Roy repeated. "Oh, _hell_, no."

"Sounds perfect!" Wally said, and meant everything.

* * *

><p><em>...<em>

_Look for Chastity's backstory and the introduction of Wendy, coming soon to a computer near you!_


End file.
